Now With Added Oxford Comma!

SOTF has slipped back into publication. Edited, reformatted, recovered, and still hilarious. I read it back to front and put that Oxford comma back where it belongs. If you haven’t yet gotten your copy of this funny, freaky, fantastical Fey Realm fantasy romance, now’s a good time while it’s on sale for 2.99.

If for some reason you happened to have used your Amazon account to buy the paperback that was released from my previous publisher, the new ebook version only costs .99 with the Matchbook program!

You can check out the excerpt and buy link at Amazon or on my book page.

Sincerely,

Jody W & Meankitty

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5 Days of Terrible Freedom

For the next five days (today is April 21) my entire Mari Shu series is free on Amazon to celebrate my escape from the Kindle Unlimited program when I forgot to cancel out the automatic renewal! After that it will go wide.

But you’re going to get it now, right, for FREE?

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Earthbound Passion: The first volume in the series focuses on what happens if Mari Shu’s choices lead her and her sisters to remain on Olde Olde Olde Olde Olde Earth while she supports them as a sexxorer.

Martian Conquest: Volume two finds Mari Shu and her sweet innocent siblings venturing to Mars to find jobs and a better life, even though it appears some people there have…illegal cybermech appendages.

MariShu3_Far_Galaxies_100Far Galaxies: The third and most insane of the Mari Shu volumes sends Mari Shu, Cassie and Trish into the beyond on a huge sleep-pod ship destined for New Terra, the pilgrims in Olde Earth’s attempt to populate the entire galaxy! What adventures await them at the end of the line–and in between?

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The Whole TruthI also made The Whole Truth free. It’s not a spoof, it’s a snarky urban fantasy-lite style book about a twenty-something who can see lies and has mostly used that secret skill to get good deals…until the men in black find her.

I think it’s actually a pretty darn good yarn. The Mari Shu books, on the other hand, really need some highly offended reviews on Amazon, people saying these are the nastiest, weirdest, most offensive things they’ve ever read. I feel like that’s a great way to spur sales! I’ll even send you a fill in the blank Mad Libs style review form if you want to post a review but don’t really want to write one :).

No, seriously, Meankitty does Bad Libs and now you can, too.

Jody Wallace
Smart. Snarky. Seductive. And that’s just the books.
http://www.jodywallace.com * http://www.meankitty.com

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40% off All Samhain Titles

In unfortunate news, Samhain Publishing, who has published 8 of my books, will be going out of business in the coming year. In less unfortunate news, they are currently having a 40% off sale of all their books! Samhain isn’t one of those publishers which is going to stiff authors of their royalties, so I have no qualms about supporting them until the end.

Here’s my Samhain books:

Urban Fantasy Romance:

Disciple72lgTangible & Disciple — Dreamwalkers protecting the rest of us from the monsters our brains create. Plus T-Rexes.

Paranormal romance:

One Thousand KissesSurvival of the Fairest, 1000 Kisses, Liam’s Gold – A Fey Realm two steps away from the human realm filled with magic and impossible things! Too bad fairies can’t use magic when they enter the human world–or can they?

Contemporary Romance (w/a Ellie Marvel)

Claustrophobic ChristmasWhat She Deserves, Claustrophobic Christmas: High school reunion hijinks and stuck in an icy traffic jam hijinks. Can’t go wrong with the Tallwood tales 🙂

Get them before they’re gone!

In sadness —

Jody W & Meankitty

www.jodywallace.com * www.meankitty.com

 

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Hedgie Wants To Hang Out

Only 1 or 2 more days left for my urban fantasies to be on sale! You can get all the buy links here http://bit.ly/1Ssjt9i but what I really want to talk to you about are the hedgehog earrings I said I’d give away to newsletter subscribers.

Y’all?

Witness.

hedgiesblueAre these the cutest, googly eyed little things you’ve EVER seen or what? I used cotton crochet thread, black glass beads for the nose, and silver findings. I also used some STIFFY to help them keep their shape. Man, they turned out so very well. Would you like a pair?

 

Here’s what they look like on:

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They are definitely big enough to garner some attention but lightweight. They won’t drag your lobes down at all. And I didn’t just make blue ones. I made brown ones!

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The brown ones are shaped a little differently, yeah, a little pokier, and they needed extra STIFFY to keep their spines from curling. But variety is the spice of life and your earring collection, am I right?

All you have to do to win these earrings for your own is be a member of my newsletter subscribers when I draw the lucky name here in a few days.

These brown hedgehogs have a bit of an attitude, though. Don’t you think? Or something.

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He might be looking at you that way because he wants to come live at your house! But it might be…

HEY STOP THAT BROWN HEDGIE!

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And that, friends, is how you get MORE hedgie earrings.

But seriously. Your time’s almost up!

Jody W. & Meankitty

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Monica McCabe Hates Sneaky

In my “What Scares You?” interview series, I dragged author Monica McCabe into the mix even though she says she doesn’t love horror movies. They give poor Monica nightmares! It’s a good thing Dreamwalkers are completely fictional because I think Monica’s brain would create a lot of frightening wraiths for the Somnium to deal with!

diamonleg1) What are the scariest movies, TV and books you can think of?

A: I tend to avoid truly scary stuff because I like to sleep at night. That said, I did see a couple movies when I was younger that scared me so bad I’m still not over it.

  • 1) A movie called ‘Don’t Be Afraid Of The Dark’. It was about a couple who bought an old Victorian mansion and remodeled. But creepy creatures lived in the walls and they got out when they pried open a sealed coal chute. Spoiler: They GOT HER in the end. **shivers** To this day, I refuse to leave closet doors open and hate that dark void under the bed.
  • 2) An uber scary episode of the Twilight Zone. A woman bought a tribal doll on a trip to Africa. It had spiked teeth, an evil sneer, and a razor sharp spear. Also had a note that said not to ever let the necklace fall off. Of course it did, the little horror came to life, and despite every attempt to kill it (lock it in a suitcase, fry it in the oven), the thing GOT HER in the end.

2) What monsters do you think your brain would create or has created in your books?

A: Probably creepy little Gollum creatures that live in the basement or attic. They have sharp teeth and a thirst for blood. Oh no…is it getting dark outside?

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3) What kind of dreamwalker hero or heroine do you think would be required to dispatch your nightmares? (Romance optional!)

A: One with serious Ninja skills. Or maybe the ability to generate high-intensity flame, be it X-Men style or with a handy fire blasting rocket launcher. Fry the horrors into crispy critters!

4) Bonus question: What pop culture monsters do you think the dreamwalkers have the most trouble killing?

A: Anything sneaky. I hate sneaky. Or the kind of monster that can regenerate. You think they are dead, but in reality they are coming back. Stronger, eviler, and pissed off. But especially…the kind that GET YOU in the end.

***

Aren’t you glad we GOT MONICA to answer the interview questions?? For more dream-created monsters, check out TANGIBLE & DISCIPLE, now on super sale.

Jody Wallace

Smart. Snarky. Seductive. And that’s just the books.

http://www.jodywallace.com * http://www.meankitty.com

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Save Me, Wolverine!

Yesterday we found out that DB Sieders is scared of clowns. Today we’re going to find out that author Kolin Mofield thinks Hugh Jackman would make a good dreamwalker.

1) What are the scariest movies, TV and books you can think of?

Misery by Stephen King, Cujo by Stephen King, well, most books by Stephen King. Thinner, The Night Shift, and the worst for me, “It”.

The Conjuring was a little scary for me, thinking that it really happened. Although I am not easily scared, I would be scared to be in one of the episodes of Supernatural.

2) What monsters do you think your brain would create or has created in your books?

I once dreamed of a rabid tiger that I could read telepathically. Monsters who live in gold mines, caves and underground lakes. Of course the real-life serial killers often seep in and give me story ideas. Being covered in live maggots is also a terrible dream.

3) What kind of dreamwalker hero or heroine do you think would be required to dispatch your nightmares? (Romance optional!)

The guy who plays Wolverine. 😀

(I don’t have the rights to any Wolverine photos, but look at these claws!)

Basil

4) Bonus question: What pop culture monsters do you think the dreamwalkers have the most trouble killing?

shapeshifters

***

Oooooh, this gives me some ideas! And remember — the books at a delightfully reduced price until February 5 are Tangible and Disciple.

Jody Wallace

Smart. Snarky. Seductive. And that’s just the books.

http://www.jodywallace.com * http://www.meankitty.com

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DB Sieders Is Scared Of Clowns

As part of my excitement that my urban fantasies are at an all-time low price of only 99 cents (Tangible) and 1.99 (Disciple), I’ve been nagging author friends about what they find scary. The premise of Dreamwalkers is that certain human brains make nightmares that can come to life and eat people. The secret organization that exists to fight the monsters and train the dreamers is called the Somnium. Oftentimes these nightmares take the shape of popular culture creations, but sometimes there are classics.

So today I asked DB Sieders

1) What are the scariest movies, TV and books you can think of?

Stephen King is a master, and I can think of a half-dozen short stories that have kept me up at night (his Nightshift anthology comes to mind). Hannibal Lecter is super scary. Thomas Harris’s most famous villain was masterfully written, and Anthony Hopkins brought him to life in the most disturbing and terrifying way in the film adaptations of The Silence of the Lambs and Hannibal. For television, Outlander fan that I am, I’d have to go with episodes featuring Black Jack Randall. The final two episodes of Season 1 were truly gut wrenching, but the scene in “The Garrison Commander” episode in which actor Tobias Menzies delivers a chilling account of BJR flogging Jamie Fraser within an inch of his life, describing his scarred and bloody back as “the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen,” chilled me to the bone.

2) What monsters do you think your brain would create or has created in your books? (Caveat: real world human monsters don’t tend to get created, just things like vampires and mega spiders, and the size of the monster tends to be between 3-12 feet. If your nightmare is more of an “event”, like falling or appearing in public naked, I bet there’s a monster that represents that kind of horror!)

I hate clowns, so I’m guessing my brain would conjure something like that. The clown (Pennywise/It) from Stephen King’s It comes to mind – go ahead and throw in that creepy clown from Poltergeist that attacks the little brother. Total nightmare material!

LLAs far as my own books, I’ve conjured a handsome/charming yet scary-as-hell Grim Reaper, elemental shapeshifters that can transform into fearsome water dragons and horrendous flying monsters resembling wasps, and a couple of really psycho ‘mean girl’ types.

3) What kind of dreamwalker hero or heroine do you think would be required to dispatch your nightmares? (Romance optional!)

You know, I think I’d want someone like professor Lupin from Harry Potter. Laughter is the best medicine, so if you can find a way to laugh in the face of your fears, you’d stand a pretty good chance of defeating them. So whip out the wand and cry, “Riddikulus!” to banish those awful clowns, shapeshifter, and mean girls!

4) Bonus question: What pop culture monsters do you think the dreamwalkers have the most trouble killing?

Soap Opera villains! They ALWAYS come back 😉

Check back soon for more scary interviews!

Jody Wallace

Smart. Snarky. Seductive. And that’s just the books.

http://www.jodywallace.com * http://www.meankitty.com

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I Wrote Holiday Stories

tempchristmasDo you like winter-themed holidays? So far, I’ve written four winter holiday tales. All but one are FREE, too. Can’t beat that price with a stick. I mean, you could, metaphorically, I suppose, if you put my book on your reader and it was so bad you took a stick to the device. If that happens, send me a photo of the broken device and I will autograph it for you, also free!

So, here’s the free goodies:

“New Year’s Magic” in the bounteous TINY TREATS anthology. A witch, a cat, and New Year’s Eve: http://jodywallace.com/books/new-years-magic/

“Wintertide Spell” is a prequel to A SPELL FOR SUSANNAH, takes place in the fantasy land of the Middle Kingdoms, but stands alone. http://jodywallace.com/books/a-wintertide-spell/

“The Worst Christmas” is another prequel to WHAT SHE DESERVES and is a YA-set tale of high school, snow storms and unexpected gifts: http://jodywallace.com/books/the-worst-christmas/

Claustrophobic ChristmasThe one you’d have to pay for, unless you email me some really nice compliments and I check to see if I have more author copies (hehe), is CLAUSTROPHOBIC CHRISTMAS, a steamy Tallwood novella involving an ice storm, a traffic jam caused by said ice storm, and two weary, I mean, SEXY travelers forced to make their own heat: http://jodywallace.com/books/claustrophobic-christmas/

I had the wonderful opportunity to beta for a friend of mine, Sierra Donovan, for her recently released holiday tale with a hero named FRED, whom I adore: http://www.amazon.com/Christmas-Like-Present-Sierra-Donovan-ebook/dp/B00J7W1FSI It’s a sweet, funny read with a holiday theme.

Also I love anything Christmasy Carla Kelly has written, such as http://www.amazon.com/Seasons-Regency-Greetings-Christmas-Novellas-ebook/dp/B00PB648HY/ and http://www.amazon.com/Coming-Home-Christmas-Paradise%5CO-Tree%5CNo-ebook/dp/B005WJDOF2/ and Mary Balogh http://www.amazon.com/Under-Mistletoe-Signet-Eclipse-Balogh-ebook/dp/B000OIZTV8/

My whole family approves of Bad Kitty’s Xmas tale, including the cats, http://www.amazon.com/Bad-Kitty-Christmas-Nick-Bruel-ebook/dp/B007L8LUH6/ , which is surprisingly tear-jerky for a picture book.

Now — add to my holiday reading list, if you please! What are your favorites in the comments?

Jody W & Meankitty

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