Tangible Now On Sale!

To get everyone ready for the upcoming release of DISCIPLE, Samhain has graciously put TANGIBLE on sale for less than a buck!

Buy Links: All Romance eBooks, Amazon, B&N, iTunes, Kobo, Samhain
Add it to your Goodreads!

Dreams don’t come true, but nightmares do.

When Zeke Garrett is reactivated to mentor the next dreamer that pops up on the Somnium’s radar, he’s sure it’s a mistake. The covert organization is still struggling to conceal the fallout from his last assignment, a fatal catastrophe.

From the first blast of her pepper spray, he realizes this neonati, whose nightmares manifest vampires straight from the pages of pop-culture, is more than he bargained for—a potential dreamwalker. But before her training can begin, he has to convince the stubborn, mouthy woman she’s not dreaming.

Maggie Mackey hasn’t slept well in a month, but that doesn’t explain how the monsters from her nightmares suddenly seem so real. Or why, when a team of intimidating, sword-wielding toughs rescue her, their leader captures her mouth in a swift, knee-weakening kiss.

Once he tears himself away, Zeke’s mental forehead smacking begins. Their embrace has confirmed they have a rare tangible bond, a phenomenon which fooled him once before. Somehow he must tutor the woman of his dreams without getting attached. Otherwise her nightmares could become his own.

Warning: Title contains lots of cussing, pop culture references and monsters with nasty, big, pointy teeth.

Double Book Release — Adventures of Mari Shu

Dear Readers of Romance and SF,

Do you crave a little WTF in your genre fiction from time to time?

Do you often wish the characters would do something different than what the author had them do?

planetship

Do you like to see a morally upstanding, hardworking protagonist challenged by circumstance and fate in a bleak futuristic setting?

Do you like coffee?

How about tea?

Or chocolate?

If you answered yes or no to any of the above questions, then I have got the books for you!

Today is the official release day for the first two volumes of The Interactive Adventures of Mari Shu!

MariShuEarth100

Mari Shu, a factory drudge in the year 4000-something, must choose how to protect her sisters, her purity, and her own conscience in a bleak futuristic society that’s been polluted by smog, rampant commercialism, tacky jumpsuits, sexual perversions, unjust socioeconomics, interstellar travel, and inconsistent use of the Oxford comma. (HORRORS!)

In book 1, Earthbound Passion, Mari Shu’s decision to stick to Olde Earth opportunities, such as professional sexxoring, has deeper consequences than she could ever have dreamed possible.

MariShu_Martian_Final250In book 2, Martian Conquest, Mari Shu decides to desert Olde Earth for the unfamiliar comforts and sexual practices of Mars…and possible elevation to the elite Martian rover class.

The better these books do, the faster I’ll write MOAR MOAR MOAR, in the midnight hour and at other times. But to get me to stay up until midnight writing them on a regular basis, I’ll need a lot of encouragement. Just FYI.

Please note: these books are delightful, delightful parodies. They are raunchy. They namedrop a lot. They make fun of all your favorite things. And my favorite things too. They are not for kids. Cats think they’re stupid.

DIG IN!

Sincerely,

Jody Wallace
Author, Cat Person, Amigurumist of the Apocalypse
http://www.jodywallace.com * http://www.meankitty.com

Tangible Updates – Preordering, Review Copies, Etc.

A quick post today. Just noticed last night that Tangible is available for preorder! Do any of you preorder books? Also, the first chapter is available for free at my site, it’s on GoodReads, and I have review copies available.

What now? (1) Read the first chapter for free. (2) Invest in a dream dictionary. (3) Click the small cover to see the large cover. (4) Contact me about review copies. (5) Review it, for better or for worse, at GoodReads

Buy Links for Tangible:

Amazon (preorder)

B&N (preorder)

Kobo (preorder)

Samhain (preorder)

That’s it — short and schaweet!

Jody W.
www.jodywallace.com * www.meankitty.com

Now on Sale: Something to Thaw any Winter Ice

CLAUSTROPHOBIC CHRISTMAS — Contemporary Romance by Ellie Marvel

Travel agent Darcy Burkell has a secret. She’s got a touch of claustrophobia (hence the title) and hasn’t traveled much. When she hires photographer James Jones, they become close cyber-friends, inspiring James to conclude Darcy in the woman for him—someone who’ll travel with him. But when he shows up at Darcy’s office unannounced and suggests they take a holiday trip together, she turns him down flat.

Her resolve is tested when she and James become gridlocked by an ice storm. Impassable roads force them to spend hours together in his vehicle…shivering. And cuddling. Will the fires still burn between them after Darcy confesses her secret?

So far I’ve seen it at:

Places you can buy Claustrophobic Christmas:

Amazon
Barnes & Noble
Books on Board
Lybrary.com
Samhain

Try the entire first chapter free!

I need to see how much of a sample you get on the Kindle…

Jody W.
www.jodywallace.com * www.meankitty.com

Snippet Saturday: Villain’s POV

Snippet Saturday is the brainchild of author Lauren Dane, wherein a group of authors selects thematic excerpts from their work and shares them on Saturday mornings. This Saturday’s snippet is ascene from a villain’s POV. Below I’ve got a short scene from Survival of the Fairest where the villain who isn’t the villain meets the villain who is the villain.

*****

The scene opens when Elder Embor of Clan Torval, the fairy Primary, has failed to capture the heroine, Talista, who is AWOL in humanspace. In Vegas, no less. He requests that the local fairy ring agent give him a report.

***

When the gray-haired fairy was brought to him, she crushed out her cigarette and blew a cloud of smoke in his face. Embor closed his eyes and prayed for patience, though it was difficult surrounded by poisonous fumes.

The woman had become peculiar and insubordinate during her stint in humanspace, but her record showed no complaints. Her team had identified many entries to increase the fragmented lists of individuals to be monitored. Her achievements were undeniable. The Agent Oversight Committee in charge of humanspace agents was satisfied with her mental health. Ring agents who spent years with humans often became eccentric. Who wouldn’t after inhabiting this stinking world for decades?

“Lit out on you, did she?” Her voice was a rusted creak of dissolution. She brushed an ash from her filmy white skirt and flipped the butt at the trashcan. “Sucks to do things without magic, don’t it?”

“It’s more difficult than need be. Creating spellglobes to locate her would take time, time we don’t have.” It would also require the cooperation of Anisette or the twins’ parents, and he wasn’t ready to alert Clan Serendipity to the fact that their beloved princess was AWOL in humanspace.

The woman shifted on the hotel bed and crossed one leg over the other. A bony knee poked through a hole in her tights. “It would suck to live like this, what, fifty years? Get you a head of gray hair and a crop of wrinkles worse than a whore’s bed. The piss-paltry few months you Realmsiders experienced during the Incident ain’t got nothing on it for aches and pains.”

Embor tightened his lips to prevent himself from savaging the old fairy. The Incident had nearly devastated the Realm. He replied in an even voice. “Humanspace isn’t healthy in large doses. Your commitment does your clan honor.”

“Commitment my pasty white ass.” She assessed him with pale eyes. “I hear twosies can’t go longer than a week or two without suffering the nail-heads.”

“Correct.” Embor could stave off separation sickness, but the princess couldn’t. “You see why it’s imperative we retrieve Talista soon.”

***

Yes, I loved both these characters so much they showed up in One Thousand Kisses.

Jody W.
www.jodywallace.com * www.meankitty.com

More excerpts about villains:
Anne Rainey
Selena Robins
Eliza Gayle
Mari Carr
McKenna Jeffries
Mandy M Roth
Myla Jackson
Taige Crenshaw
Selena Blake
Vivian Arend
Beth-Ann Mason
HelenKay Dimon
Shelli Stevens
Lauren Dane
TJ Michaels
Shiloh Walker

Read an Ebook Week — Free Stuff

This week is Read an Ebook week, and there’s a long list of vendors who are offering discounts on books to celebrate: http://www.ebookweek.com/ebook_store.html There are free ebooks to be had in any number of locations (including one from me, so keep reading). It’s sort of a “Read an Ebook Week — No Purchase Necessary!” although purchases do keep people like me in business :).

Some authors and sites are giving away free ebooks:

http://www.ebookweek.com/partners.html is a list of ones who partnered with the official site.

Samhain’s authors are giving away tons of free ebooks on their Café chat loop: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/samhaincafe/

Here are more posts about Ebook Week:

AAR Blog: http://www.likesbooks.com/blog/?p=3951

Austenblog: http://austenblog.com/2010/03/09/its-read-an-ebook-week/

Galleycat: http://www.mediabistro.com/galleycat/ebooks/celebrate_read_an_ebook_week__154310.asp

Huffington Post: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mark-coker/the-story-behind-read-an_b_487343.html

Publetariat: http://www.publetariat.com/think/interview-read-ebook-week-founder-rita-toews

In celebration, I’m going to offer a free ebook to anyone who wants it too. At the beginning of this year, the authors of SUM3 (an anthology of speculative romance) received the rights back to their stories from Zumaya Publishing. My entry in that antho was called “Cooley’s Panther”. It’s the story of a woman, a panther and how digital photography brought them closer together. And also, cookies. So anyone who wants a copy, just email me. I’ve got it in .rtf and I believe I can make a PDF, but I don’t have the capability to provide other formats, alas. A publisher I am not.

Click here for my contact information. The link goes to my main website.

Jody W.
So much cyberspace, so little time!
www.jodywallace.com * www.meankitty.com

13 Things They Could Have Named The iPad

If you’re online at all, you may well have clued in to the fact that today Apple introduced their newest gadget to the world, the iPad. Shortly after the news broke, “iTampon” started trending on Twitter, and iMaxi and iMini jokes abounded. Would the iPad have wings for in-flight use? Would it come with accompanying iMotrin?

The question of the day, besides how much does it cost, is whether Apple consulted ANY women about the naming of their latest toy. As a woman, I thought I’d share a list of names for the device that don’t sound like a digital feminine napkin:

1. iSlate
2. iTablet
3. iWad
4. iPuppy
5. iEverything
6. iClaudius
7. iWanttobelieve (iWant for short)
8. iOweyou
9. iBeenworkinontherailroad
10. iIsir
11. iPatooty
12. iYiyi
13. iCantbelieveitsnotkindle

***

Meankitty decided she’d share a list of gadget names too:

1. iCat
2. iTuna
3. iAmawesome
4. iHairybugger
5. iHatefleas
6. iCouldntcareless
7. iWillknockitoffthetableassoonasyouturnyourback
8. iBirdTV
9. iNuisance
10. iDontliketosharethehumansattention
11. iUnlessiamnotinthemoodforattention
12. iWouldratheryouspendyourmoneyoncattrees
13. iButtwarmer

Got any better ideas yourself?

Jody W. & Meankitty
http://www.jodywallace.com/ * http://www.meankitty.com/

Free Short Story

For the winter holidays, Samhain Publishing gives away free short stories by its authors to celebrate all the variations of the season. Last year I wrote a prequel of sorts to my fantasy romance A SPELL FOR SUSANNAH called “A Spell for Susannah’s Mother”. (Currently not accessible due to a hosting issue but if you email me I’ll send it to you.)

This year I wrote a prequel to my contemporary Ellie Marvel romance WHAT SHE DESERVES called “The Worst Christmas” or “The Only Way This Christmas Could Get Any Worse”, but that title was too long. Though I would label the novella itself as adult and spicy, the short story is YA, appropriate for 13+ or thereabouts. It has some cursing but no sexual situations.

Which I hope doesn’t mean you’re no longer interested in reading!

THE WORST CHRISTMAS
by Ellie Marvel
Ebook release: December 4, 2009
Length: Short Story (~8300 words)
Genre: YA fiction (sweet)
Price: Free!
From: Samhain Publishing

About the book:

Winifred Sampson can’t believe Peter Duvall ruined her new cashmere sweater at the honor society banquet and her secret crush, quarterback Chase McKnight, saw the whole thing. When an ice storm hits Tallwood, Tennessee, for Christmas that year, will Peter somehow ruin her Christmas too? Or is Mother Nature evil enough without Peter’s help?

Download the story at http://tinyurl.com/yhck8eq

Jody W.
www.jodywallace.com

Talking Toys and Two Other Giveaways

Giveaway 1: In honor of Read an Ebook Week, I and a bunch of other Samhain authors are participating in a Samhellion Scavenger Hunt. My book is on the table today, March 10: http://www.thesamhellion.com/readanebook.htm

Giveaway 2: Also in honor of Read an Ebook Week (and also with a bunch of other Samhain authors), I’m chatting at the Samhain Cafe loop from 8-9 a.m. CST and giving away a copy of Liam’s Gold since it’s almost St. Paddy’s Day: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/samhaincafe/

Talking Toys: There is a hippo lost somewhere in the depths of my family conveyance that talks whenever the car jiggles–one of those motion sensitive things. I can’t find it, and it’s driving me nuts. Since I believe it was a fast food giveaway, I would have thought the battery would have run down much, much sooner than it has. The children have taken to screeching with laughter and chanting the words the toy says whenever it happens, adding to my pleasure.

Jody W.
www.jodywallace.com

A Plethora of Free Reads

Samhain is hosting a free reads program where they are posting holiday themed short stories by their authors: http://www.thesamhellion.com/ebooks.htm

I participated with a little tale called “A Spell for Susannah’s Mother” and I’ll let you know when it’s due to be posted. It’s kind of a prequel to “A Spell for Susannah” (obviously), but it does stand alone. The blurb:

If the King is fated to love thirteen women before he turns fifty, is he still husband material? One cold, wet Wintertide Eve, the Queen labors over the answer to her husband’s curse.

These PDFs are free, but Samhain and its authors would like readers to download them from the Samhain page so we can track how popular this function is. If you like one of these stories and want to share it with another reader, please have them snag it from the Samhain site.

JW