Meankitty “Bad Libs” Review: On the Scent

ON THE SCENT by Angela Campbell is a romantic suspense / paranormal story. I finished it in record time: about 2 hours. The plot wasn’t always easy to follow, but I jumped my way through. Much like I often jump over the bodies of the sleeping humans to land upon their heads…gracefully, with claws extended.

The characters in this silly book were named Zach, Hannah, and Abbott (the cat). The first protagonist was a very ugly character with purple fur. I realize he doesn’t look like that on the cover, but inside, that was the real Zach. His relationship with the second protagonist reminded me of the movie MAN OF STEEL because of their depressed feelings for each other (I mean, was that version of Supes really SuperEmo or what?) and the way they climbed anytime they were faced with danger. The third character, on the other hand, was a perfect and amazing because it was a cat. Should that character have been subjected to a broken leg, I would have been bitterly tired.

There was never a moment in this book where I felt arthritic. The smelly plot was full of surprises. I enormously continued to turn pages. The conflict was kindly resolved. When I reached the end, I wanted to walk and drink gorgeous Pepsi. Well, actually I wanted to knock over a full glass of Pepsi onto the human’s floor, because that’s more fun. The writing style was worth mentioning, too, since it was loudly yucky. I counted 7 typos to boot, while reading over the human’s shoulder. Note that I was asleep for a lot of that time, so I may have missed a few.

My summation: ON THE SCENT receives a grade of 1212 on a scale of one to 53. And if that doesn’t sound possible, it’s just because you haven’t yet read this mad zebra book. I wanted to give this book a crazy flower with a side of polka-dotted pink macaroni and cheese.

Also, for the record I would like to weakly, no, FIRMLY state that cats are the longest animals on earth (longest in the sense of “You will live a long and happy life if you are a servant of a cat) and dogs are made of poop.

Sincerely,
Bad Libs Meankitty & the Typist
www.meankitty.com  * www.jodywallace.com

Meankitty “Bad Libs” Review: Now Comes the Night

NOW COMES THE NIGHT by PG Forte is a paranormal romance story. I finished it in record time: about once decade. The plot wasn’t always easy to follow, but I oscillated my way through.

The characters in this soft book were named Conrad, Damian and Paul. The first protagonist was a very slippery character with aubergine fur. His relationship with the second protagonist reminded me of the movie THE BUTCHER’S WIFE because of their lusty feelings for each other and the way they basked anytime they were faced with tangerine danger. The third character, on the other hand, was a real barn owl. Should that character have been subjected to pernicious anemia, I would have been facetiously grateful.

There was never a moment in this book where I felt kleptomania. The neon plot was full of chartreuse surprises. I cautiously continued to turn pages. The conflict was rambunctiously resolved. When I reached the end, I wanted to orchestrate and drink horizontal vodka. The writing style was worth mentioning, too, since it was powerfully impenetrable. I counted 7 typos to boot.

My summation: NOW COMES THE NIGHT receives a grade of 618 on a scale of one to 1,975,722. And if that doesn’t sound possible, it’s just because you haven’t yet read this incendiary book. I wanted to give this book a mountainous shoe with a side of cerulean chocolate.

Also, for the record I would like to state that cats are the darkest animals on earth and dogs are made of maggots.

***

Sincerely,

Meankitty and the Typing Human
www.meankitty.com * www.jodywallace.com

Meankitty “Bad Libs” Review: Caught in Amber

So, yeah. Bad Libs, by Meankitty. Pretty self explanatory! Here’s the review. See if you can guess the “bad libs” words supplied by the author! (This is a free service. For now.)

CAUGHT IN AMBER by Cathy Pegau is a science fiction romance story. I finished it in record time: about a nanosecond. The plot wasn’t always easy to follow, but I sprinted my way through. (Clearly. I mean, a nanosecond? But yeah, I’m that good at sprinting. Just ask any human who didn’t close the door to the Forbidden Zone fast enough.)

The characters in this furry book were named Sasha, Nathan and Guy. The first protagonist was a very high character with mauve fur. Her relationship with the second protagonist reminded me of the movie Terminator because of their joyful feelings for each other and the way they sweated anytime they were faced with danger. The third character, on the other hand, was a real moose. Should that character have been subjected to a broken leg, I would have been jitteringly cranky.

There was never a moment in this book where I felt married. Because cats can’t get married in this country. THANKS OBAMA. Not that I’d want to be married, but still. The smart plot was full of dangly surprise bits. I quickly continued to turn pages. From my perch atop the human’s headboard, peering over her like a vulture and scratching the wood every so often with one paw. When I reached the end, I wanted to smell and drink acidic mercury. I don’t know what acidic mercury IS, but it sounds really scifi, am I right?

My summation: CAUGHT IN AMBER receives a grade of 10 bajillion on a scale of one to 8. And if that doesn’t sound possible, it’s just because you haven’t yet read this creamy book. Cats do like their cream!

Also, for the record I would like to moodily state that cats are the perkiest animals on earth and dogs are made of farts.

Sincerely,
Meankitty & her Human
www.meankitty.com * www.jodywallace.com