MORE DOGS. I don’t know what it is with all these dog writer types out there, but my human just keeps stumbling across them like fleas. What happened to all the cat-owned writers? Did we already interview them all? I don’t know, but I’ve got another dog for you today, by the name of Cory (and Winston), who lives with author Sharon Cullen.
1) So, your human writes books. Are they (a) full of praise and hyped up lies about dogs; or (b) do they contain interesting stories?
Well, now, you certainly don’t mince words. Her stories are interesting and they contain dogs, but no cats.
2) If writers are supposed to be so smart, why does your writer have a dog instead of a cat when it’s common knowledge cats are better? Does that mean your writer isn’t very smart?
Psssshhh. So that’s how this interview is going to go, is it? My writer actually has TWO dogs. Winston is a Labrador Retriever. My name is Cory and I am an American Bulldog. Winston’s old. He can’t hear very well and he sometimes has trouble getting around. I like to snuggle with him. And my writer is very smart. She writes books.
3) So why did your human end up a writer instead of a animal sanctuary owner or something like that?
My human would love to adopt every abandoned dog out there, but she says she can’t afford it and the house is too small. She hopes to someday sign that million dollar contract that would allow her to purchase a larger home for all the DOGS she wants to adopt.
4) Does being a writer mean your human is home all day and easy to access? What is her day like?
Unfortunately she works outside the home so she isn’t home to scratch my belly all day long. When she is home she lets us out in the morning and feeds us, then she pets us for awhile. After that we curl up in the sunny patch and fall asleep. She calls this our food coma. That’s when she gets some work done, like promoting and what she calls the “business” side of writing. Whatever that means. Every once in a while we’ll wake up enough to wander over and ask for an ear scratching and she’ll happily oblige. She writes in the evening, after our dinner. I like to play in the evening and she gets mad sometimes because if she doesn’t pay enough attention to me I sort of knock her lap top over.
5) As a dog, you’re probably not devious or fascinating, but on the off-chance you do have feline traits, what are your techniques for distracting your human during crucial writing moments?
Sometimes I get jealous of her computer because its the only thing that can sit on her lap. I would make a GREAT lap dog, but she doesn’t allow me up there. And she stares at that screen ALL THE TIME. Sometimes I don’t like it. I’ve learned that I can get attention real fast if I put my nose under her laptop and flip it off her lap. She gets mad but when I look at her with my big brown eyes she’ll usually pet me.
I’ve also learned how to unplug her laptop. She gets mad at that too, but it doesn’t last long. All I have to do is bat my long eyelashes at her.
6) What indignities and neglect have you suffered because of your human’s writing career (besides the absence of a cat to properly rule the house)?
Sometimes, when her fingers are flying across the keyboard, she’ll forget to feed us on time. We like to start bugging her about eating around 4pm but she grumbles that it’s way too early for us to eat. But we’re HUNGRY. So we pace in front of her. If she doesn’t move, then I’ll bark, but that just makes her growl at me. What really gets her up and moving is when I grab things like the mouse, or the pillows off the couch. Then she’ll get up and feed us.
7) We’ve established your human doesn’t write stories full of hyped up lies about dogs. Tell me about the felines in your human’s fiction. How often do they appear and how big a part do they play?
Er. Well. That is to say. I don’t believe there are any felines in her books. There are dogs, of course, because no story is complete without a loyal dog at her hero or heroine’s side. But no cats.,
8) When your human gets together with other writers, do they spend half their time sniffing each other’s butts like dogs do?
Haha. You are so funny. Not. Although how they know who everyone is without sniffing butts, I don’t know.
9) Tell us, from a dog’s POV, about your humans most recent publication.
The hero, Phin, is a pirate and the king has told him to capture a traitor or his life is forfeit. The heroine, Mairi, is the sister of the traitor who hires Phin to find her brother, not knowing Phin has to kill her brother. It’s all rather intriguing and suspenseful.
10) What is your human’s next project (bonus points if you answer: getting a cat)?
From what I’ve heard her say, it’s a different story than she usually writes. No suspense or danger or intrigue in this one. It’s about a hero who returns from the Crimean War with a brain injury. He and his wife have to learn to live with his injuries and find a way to save their marriage. That book will be released in the beginning of 2015. No cats. But the story is still a work-in-progress. If she includes a cat, I’ll have to flip her laptop off her lap.