Meankitty Wants to Know: Candice Gilmer

Today, Meankitty has consented to interview author Candice Gilmer. Candice lives with no cats. Granted, she does herd small humans on occasion, which we hear is a bit LIKE herding cats, only less scratchy. Gilmer hates tornado season, just like Typing Slave and Meankitty (Meankitty is pictured, not Candice, btw), and dresses hair when she’s not writing. Let’s find out why her life is otherwise drab, meaningless and free of cat hair balls…

1) Why did you decide to be a writer instead of a cat sanctuary owner?

I became a writer because I grew up in a house of people always telling stories. There’s never been any short one-liners in my house. It’s always a large, overdone production. We’re a very creative group, and I took that over-abundance of imagination (and comedy, because the people in my family are hilarious, whether they mean to be or not) and decided to write it down. It was too good to keep to myself.

I get told at least once a month, now, though, because they know I use the family for material, “Don’t put that in a book.”

I just smile and use it anyway.

2) Why do you think cats are better than dogs? (Since you call yourself a writer, I trust your answer will be eloquent.)

Cats are wonderful, because they do their own thing, and aside from needing food, water and fresh litter from time to time, they take care of themselves. While I think dogs can be cute, they are attention whores, and I’m a busy mother, a writer and have a day job where I am a hairdresser. Those attention-loving dogs take up too much time.

3) Why is your household currently deprived of a cat?

Well, unfortunately, Meankitty, as much as I love cats and their amazing personalities, I am allergic to cats, and even with medication, I have a hard time breathing around them.

4) Tell me about the felines in your fiction. How often do they appear and how big a part do they play in your narratives?

I am so ashamed to admit, but I don’t have any felines in any of my books yet. :::bows head in shame:::

5) On the off-chance you have yet to incorporate cats into your fiction, when or how do you plan to rectify this egregious error and demonstration of poor writing skills?

I will be incorporating a feline in one book next year, and there’s a place for one in another book as well. So as soon as I can get them done, they will have felines in them. I promise!

{{Meankitty sharpens her claws and casts a dubious eye at the author…}}

6) What are your favorite works of fiction or cinema involving cats or favorite fictional cats?

The classic television show, of course, is Sabrina the Teenage Witch and her talking cat. In books, (since I have kids) I’ve seen, and quite enjoyed all the Stuart Little movies, and that very ornery cat Snowball.

7) Do you have any amazing, or at least humorous, real life cat stories you’d like to share? Barring cat stories, you may share stories about dogs embarrassing themselves if you like.

Where we live, there are always a ton of stray cats running around. I think one of the neighbors feeds all the strays. Right now, we have some kittens hanging out by our house–they’re always out and about. Very shy and timid around people, but they’re adorable, and always out playing. One is gray, one is black, with little white boots, and one is black and white spotted. I think the one with the little white boots is my favorite, because he seems the smartest, and the least timid around people.

{{Meankitty says — obviously WHITE BOOTS are a sign of high cat IQ…see above photo for proof.}}

8) Your new series involves paranormal elements — in particular, godmothers. How do you think your story Under His Nose might be different if the godmother in question were a cat instead of a regular old two-legger type?

Well, I think the godmother would be able to hide in plain sight a lot better, if she were a cat. She’s never taken on the form of a cat, but that could be a fun idea for later in the series… There are two more books coming in the Guys and Godmothers series.

Hmm… I bet we could have fun with that.

{{Meankitty says: You’re welcome! See how inspiring cats are??}}

9) One of your earliest books featured a male chef who did some TV show about making human food. How do you think the story might have changed if he were more talented than that and were doing a gourmet cat food cooking show on TV? Imagine the taste-testing scenes! And the guest stars!

Well, that certainly hasn’t been done before! I bet that would be a really fun show on the Food Network. And I’m sure there are a lot of cat sanctuary owners that would appreciate such a show.

10) We notice you published at least one fairy tale romance, based on Rapunzel. Have you read any fairy tales with cats in them? Weren’t they the most awesome ones?

All stories with cats in them are awesome, of course.

{{Meankitty says: I think she’d dodging the question…}}

11) Did you know it’s been clinically proven (by me) that writers with cats make more money and are happier in general?

Well, I need to get a cat right away, then, I think. Allergies, be damned!

12) How do you think writers are like cats? And if they aren’t, how should they be?

I think writers are very much like cats–they tend to do whatever they want, remain in their own space, and don’t particularly worry about what other people think of them, because they’re doing their own thing.

Except for the self-grooming thing. Writers do shower, occasionally. Most do, anyway.

***

For more information about the author’s interesting-sounding-if-catless books, check out http://candicegilmer.com, where you can also find links to her Twitter, FB, etc.

For the new book itself:

Under His Nose @ Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/Under-Nose-Guys-Godmothers-ebook/dp/B00C4U6MK6/

Under His Nose @ Barnes and Noble
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/under-his-nose-candice-gilmer/1115084888?ean=9781619216648

Under His Nose @ Samhain Publishing Site
http://store.samhainpublishing.com/under-nose-p-72878.html

Meankitty & the Human Typist
www.meankitty.com * www.jodywallace.com

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