Meankitty Wants to Know: Just Poncho

Continued from yesterday’s post about the human, Mysti Parker, here we ask Poncho all the important questions and find out if his human was telling the truth.

1) So, your human writes books. Does this mean he or she is home all day and easy to access? Elaborate if necessary.

Only if the small ones aren’t begging for food or trying to pull my tail. I hide in Mysti’s closet then.

2) How large a proportion of her income do you have her devote to your gourmet tuna, cat beds, toys and other basic necessities?

As long as I can’t see the bottom of my food dish, I’m fine. I sleep with my human at night, and by day anywhere I please. In front of sunny windows is the best. There’s also the top of the couch and her office chair. She must accept this or I meow incessantly.

3) What are your techniques for distracting your human during crucial writing moments, just because it’s fun?

If she’s pecking at that clicky thing for too long, I jump in her lap and prance back and forth, making sure my tail flicks right under her nose. She just loves that.

4) What indignities and neglect have you suffered because of your human’s writing career?

The bottom of my dish is visible for hours at a time. And she doesn’t take midday naps like she used to. She has deprived me of the warmth curling up behind her legs afforded. I retaliate by expelling hairballs under her bed in the middle of the night.

5) Tell me about the felines in your human’s fiction. How often do they appear and how big a part do they play?

They do not appear at all yet…excuse me…I feel another hairball coming.

6) On the off-chance your human has yet to incorporate cats into a story, what are your plans for making sure she rectifies this egregious error and demonstration of poor writing skills?

More hairballs, more hopping onto her lap every time she sits, more lying on her feet like a dead weight at night…yes, that should do it.

From Meankitty: She promised us to rectify the error, too. We’ll give her a deadline of December 2011, shall we? We’d make it shorter, but humans are kind of slow and doglike in the brain at times.

7) What works of fiction or cinema involving cats does your human enjoy sharing with you?

We like nature shows. Animal Planet is the best. Especially if she’s on the couch with an available lap and the small ones are asleep.


Meankitty & Typing Slave  *