To Rocky and Lily:
1) So, your human writes books. Does this mean he or she is home all day and easy to access? Elaborate if necessary.
Rocky: *watches Lily run away* She’ll be all right. The only human she’ll talk around is Michelle. Our pet human is busy. She never stays in one place for too long, but she does get to spend a lot of time working. I’m not sure if it’s writing, or her business stuff, but she’s well trained and feeds me when I yell at her. That’s all that really matters.
2) How large a proportion of her income do you have her devote to your gourmet tuna, cat beds, toys and other basic necessities?
Rocky: We have the finest toilet water in town. In fact, it’s so fine, my pet human yells at me for drinking it. It’s sweet. She doesn’t want me having too much of a good thing.
3) What are your techniques for distracting your human during crucial writing moments, just because it’s fun?
Rocky: If I want something I yell, otherwise I can’t be bothered. It’s Lily who’s needy. She’s always rolling over the pet’s feet.
4) What indignities and neglect have you suffered because of your human’s writing career?
Rocky: Sometimes, and this is awful, but sometimes I have to meow two times before she’ll get up to feed me. Can you imagine? I’ve been working with her, but I don’t think she’s always the smartest pet human. You work with what you’ve got.
5) Tell me about the felines in your human’s fiction. How often do they appear and how big a part do they play?
Rocky: Fiction? Is that what’s she’s doing? And she told me vampires were real. Well, it does take two meows, I’m not surprised she believes in vampires, weres and cat shifters. *chuckling* As if cats would EVER shift into human form! *snort*
[[[Meankitty’s Note: Opposable thumbs, dude!]]]
6) On the off-chance your human has yet to incorporate cats into a story, what are your plans for making sure she rectifies this egregious error and demonstration of poor writing skills?
Rocky: I’m not sure she could accurately capture my essence. I mean, TWO meows.
7) What works of fiction or cinema involving cats does your human enjoy sharing with you?
Rocky: I prefer to watch the drooling beast dog. I swish my tail off the side of the stairs to make it jump. Stupid thing, like it could ever catch me.
8) If you could make one change to your human, what would it be?
Lily: *yelling from other room* MORE PETTING! Ah, run away!
Rocky: She’d toughen up Lily. Oh, and food on one meow.
Question for pets: Are you happy with your human? If you could tell your human one thing, what would it be?
Rocky: ONE meow and leave open that damned lid. Oh, and that mouse I left for you was a present. Why did you scream and throw it away?
What things does your human do that would mortify it if known? What does your human do that most annoys?
Rocky: She actually tried to make me swallow pills once and there was a small matter of a bath. She also sings when no one is around. Let me tell you, she’s not tomcat on the back fence if ya know what I mean. *wink*
Did your human name a character for you? Are you pleased? If not, why?
Rocky: She named one Lily, for that wimp Lilifuss the Vampire Kitty. Not that I’m jealous or anything. *licks paw*
And did your human name you for a fictional character? Hate it or love it?
Rocky: She named me after a boxer, Rocky Marciano. You punch a couple siblings in the kitten crib and suddenly you’re named after a boxer.
How do you give your writer new ideas?
Rocky: I try not to give her ideas. We’re still working on the two meow thing.
Michelle: Rocky! Get off of there!
Rocky: MEEOOOOW! MEEOOOOW! *grumbling* That’s right, that’s what I thought.
We’ll be interviewing the human, Michelle, over at The OtherWorld Diner later this month! We’ll remind you here to make sure you check.